I know I'm a little late. Perhaps you're still nursing a love hangover from last week, but just in case you still feel like spreading a little tenderness and affection throughout the fund management industry, I've created some handy dandy cut out cards to help you express your feelings. Because nothing says "show me the money" like some old school, cut out cards with your name scribbled on the back, right? So share the love y'all!

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If there's anything that several decades of mis-singing song lyrics has taught me, it's that you can't be sure that what you say is what people hear. And fund managers and investors are not immune to this phenomenon any more than the Pandora-loving public. If you've used any of the phrases below, you might want to ensure that investors picked up what you were putting down and didn't walk away with their own interpretation of your lyrics.

Oh, and visit www.kissthisguy.com for a giggle over misheard lyrics before the day is over...you'll thank me for it.

(c) 2017 MJ Alts

(c) 2017 MJ Alts

Posted
AuthorMeredith Jones

As we commence another year of the great capital raising dance, I thought it would be fun to channel all of the back and forth, yes and no, hide and seek frustration into a little game. One that harkens back to a happier and simpler time, and one that anyone who has ever been under 12 or over 60 is familiar with.

So yes, ladies and gentlemen, this year we're gonna play a little Capital Raising BINGO. Simply print out the appropriate investor or fund manager card below and mark off (and date) each time you get a designated response.

The first investor who gets a BINGO can draft me as a single-use meat shield at an event.

The first fund manager who gets a BINGO will also get a prize, custom tailored to the fund in question. 

Happy capital hunting! And may the BINGO odds be ever in your favor!

(c) 2017 MJ Alts

(c) 2017 MJ Alts

(C) 2017 MJ Alts

(C) 2017 MJ Alts

It's often quite amusing to me to chat with friends and associates outside of the investment industry about the investment industry. The vision that many folks have about the typical hedge funders' day-to-day existence is one part conspiracy theory, two parts lies and debauchery and a final part douchebaggery. So, to help clear up some of the most common misconceptions about working in alternative investments (specifically hedge funds), I thought it might be helpful to create a simple visual aid separating hedge fund fact from fiction. May this give you a giggle as you attempt to re-acclimate to work after the long weekend. 

Please note: I don't think that the hedge fund industry is in imminent danger of going away, but I do think that, like in Westeros, there will likely be some carnage before we make it through this round of poor average performance and fee, tax and regulatory pressure. Oh, and I don't own any of the images above. And finally, you may have to be 40+ or a bone fide cinematic geek to understand some of the references (Hint: Trading Places, Dr. No, Hitch), but I think you'll get enough of the picture. That is, hedge funds: More PowerPoint than "power suit, power tie, power steering." 

This week, I decided to spare everyone my usual delivery of salty commentary on the investment arena and instead, use two pictures to say my 1,000 words.

So here's this week's blog in cartoon format. Of course, as badly as I draw and with the economic outlook uncertain, these may actually only be worth 500 (or even 5) words. But hopefully you'll get my general drift that:

  1. Asset managers can limit themselves by pursuing the biggest, splashiest and easiest to find investors, and
  2. Investors can limit themselves by not casting a wide enough net when looking for investments.

Oh, and apologies to Raiders of the Lost Ark...although maybe this attempt at spoofing humor will inspire you to watch it again. 

(c) 2016 MJ Alts

(c) 2016 MJ Alts

(c) 2016 MJ Alts

(c) 2016 MJ Alts